The Move

It has been nearly two weeks since I officially moved out. What is even more interesting is the fact that I moved a large majority of my items out of our shared home but proceeded to spend nearly an entire week with him in an almost completely empty home. The running comment for years was that I had so much “junk” and that he was so compact and easy to move. Well, as luck would have it, all that “junk” of mine was really useful to making our home a “home.” The old place was empty and did not feel like much, it was horrible to live in, for that time, but when he got back from his vacation, I think things started to finally set in for him.

Without attempting to look back too closely, we had a fight one of the nights I was still staying in our shared home. He wanted to know when I would move out completely because “it wasn’t fair that he was paying the rent in full and I was still living there.” The comment struck me hard, and I called him out on how shitty of a comment that was. I was sick, I had been to Urgent Care, and more than anything in the world, I wanted to be there with him for as long as I could before he officially moved across the country. I started to cry. He took back his comment and said that he spoke before he could think.

The next day I asked for his help to move me completely and that was the first night that I stayed in my new place. Over the next few days I would text him and feel lonely. Above all else, the loneliness was enough to make me emotional and take me to a dark place. We were both going through the same feelings and we would text each other constantly. Sleeping in a bed without him was a new change and waking up without doing all of the familiar habits was a rude awakening.

I’ll always reflect back on this, but as much as I should be mad at him, I cannot help but think about how he really did become my best friend. He is still around and we still see each other quite frequently. It will all come to an end soon, the day is approaching that he will go away for good and I am unsure if I will ever see him again.

Life is a bitch.